Miscellaneous stories


Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati was lecturing one time. While he was lecturing, one
bird with a broken wing was being chased by a cat, and somehow or other the
bird was going around and around the temple. Bhaktisiddhanta was lecturing in
the temple room, and it was open, so everyone could see what was going on.
They noticed this bird going around and the cat was chasing. The bird happened
to circumambulate the temple three times, and finally right in front of
everyone, the cat got him, and feathers went everywhere. So Bhaktisiddhanta
Sarasvati said, "You see this?" All his disciples were looking. "That bird
went back to Godhead."

MORAL: He was preaching about the glories of the Lord, how it's not
imagination. And this bird happened to circumambulate the deity of Krsna three
times, and then the cat got him. He went back to Godhead.


One of Prabhupada's godbrothers came from Germany, and his name was E.G.
Schulz. He came to India in the early 1930's with a friend of his. This E.G.
Schulz became Sadananda, and he has since passed on. He got initiation from
Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati. They came to India looking for the truth, the
Supreme Truth in life. They were visiting many temples, and seeing different
gods on the altars. This Schulz, not knowing anything about Hinduism
concluded, simply from seeing the murtis in different temples, that Krsna must
be the Supreme of all these Gods. How did he conclude this?
He later told, "When I saw these different devatas, they were always doing
something. Someone was in meditation, like Lord Siva. Someone else is holding
some weapon, a sword or a trident. They're all engaged in different
activities, different kinds of work. They were all serving someone higher, or
they were aspiring for something higher, through meditation or something else.
This was clearly visible from their activities. But when I saw Radha and
Krsna, I saw that these two have nothing to do but enjoy themselves. Krsna is
just playing on the flute, Radharani is standing by His side, and They were
smiling very happily."
So he came to the conclusion that Radha and Krsna must be Supreme, because
they have nothing to do but enjoy.


In South India in town called Khainmathur in Tamil Nadu, there is one yogi. He
goes by the name of Amavasya yogi. Amavasya means "black moon." Just like in
the phases of the month, there is one night where there is no moon, totally
black, dark moon. So he's called Amavasya yogi, because that's the only time
anyone could come and see him. He lived in a box. One family built a box on
top of their house. In India most of the houses are flat on top, and you can
walk there. So for this yogi one rich family has built a box. In this box, it
is very difficult to either stand up or sit down properly. He was always in a
very uncomfortable condition. So he sits in that box for the whole month, and
the door is locked from the outside. He cannot sit and he cannot stand. He
doesn't eat either, he doesn't eat anything. He doesn't pass any stool or
urine from his body. He just sits in that box. And then on the dark moon day,
they open the box and he comes out and sits on a table, and people can come
and see him.
One devotee from ISKCON went to visit there. The devotee was from Tamil Nadu,
so he speaks the language. Some friends brought him to see the dark moon yogi.
There was a big queue, a big group of people, they were very eager to see him.
It's said he's a couple of hundred years old, as he's been supported by this
family who built the box for three generations. They all died, but he's still
there. He looks very old and wrinkled up. He also wears very strange clothes,
a funny hat and dress, all different colours. So the devotee watched when they
brought the yogi out and he was sitting on a raised platform, and then on that
day they bring him one ball of rice, and that's all he eats for the whole
month. And then one by one the people come up and get their blessings. The
devotee was second in line.
The first man was brought forward, and that man declared to the yogi, "I am
having trouble getting my driver's license. I went and took the test at the
local office, and they told me I had passed the test, but that the license
has to come from the regional office. But it did not come. So then I went to
the regional office, and they said, `Yes, we already sent to local office.'
Then I went back to the local office, and they said, `No no no, it did not
come, go back to the regional office.' So I am going back and forth, and I am
not getting my driver's license. Can you please help me to get my driver's
license? "
So the dark moon baba, he didn't understand it at all. One of the attendants
had to whisper it in his ear, then when he finally understood, he became very
angry and he began to shout, "Get out of here! Get him out! I don't want to
see this idiot! I'm sitting in my box all month and I come out and he tells me
about his driver's license! Get him out!" So they kicked him out, and then the
devotee came forward and explained about the ISKCON movement, and then he
presented him with Bhagavad-gita.
So when the dark moon baba heard this, he began to think. He didn't say
anything for some time, and then he started to say, "Vivekananda, he went to
the west," and then he started to mention all different gurus and yogis who
had gone to the west. "He went to the west, and he went to the west," etc.
"What did they do? Nothing." So then he looked at the devotee and asked, "So
what is your movement doing?"
The devotee explained, how all around the world people are chanting Hare Krsna
Hare Krsna Krsna Krsna Hare Hare/Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare in
kirtan in the streets with their hands in the air. Actually, in South India
there is a prediction that was made a long long time ago by a great mystic
that there will come a time when people all over the world will sing the names
of God, and hold their hands in the air. This is a well known prediction. When
Amavasya Baba heard this, with his very old and wizened hands he began to
clap, and he was very happy. So Amavasya Baba took the Bhagavad-gita from the
devotee, and he showed the devotee his box. "I am sitting in this box one
month, and only coming out one day. I am not eating anything for that whole
month. I am not even passing stool or urine, I am just sitting in that box.
And do you know why I am doing this? Because I don't want to take birth
again."
This is the impersonalist process. This is the situation of that yogi. He is
afraid to act as a person, because he knows that he will have to take birth.
This is not going to be a very practical program for most people, because few
people will agree to sit in a box.


The big impersonalist yogi, Sivananda Sarasvati, in Hrsikesa once got a letter
from the king of Jaipur. The king said, "I heard that you always enter into
samadhi, and I want to see that." So the yogi wrote back, "Yes, come on
February 16th, and I will enter into samadhi on that day." So the king came
and he came on the twelfth, and he waited until the 16th. In the early morning
he was in the quarters of Sivananda. When he entered he saw that Sivananda was
walking up and down. He asked him, "Swamiji, when is samadhi?" "Soon, very
soon." So while he was walking up and down he was chanting "Hare Rama Hare
Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare/Hare Krsna Hare Krsna Krsna Krsna Hare Hare." So then
the king was thinking, "Now he is doing some bhajan, but later he will do the
mystic samadhi." So time was passing by, half an hour, one hour, two hours
three hours. Swamiji was still walking up and down chanting. The king was
thinking, "When is he going to do this samadhi?" Sometimes he went before the
yogi to try to catch his attention, but the Swamiji's eyes were all locked up
in some position. And he was just chanting "Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare
Hare/Hare Krsna Hare Krsna Krsna Krsna Hare Hare," and he was getting more and
more fired up. Then he began to shaking his hands, and then slowly slowly he
was jumping a little bit. And then he was dancing and chanting very intensely.
And then finally, after five hours, when the king was completely bewildered,
the Swamiji stopped. He took a big jug of water and he was drinking,
glugluglug.
Then the king said, "So Swamiji, now you will start samadhi?" "What do you
mean start? I just came back from samadhi!" The king was bewildered. "But you
never did the pranayama or anything." "Those things are for beginners,"
Sivananda said. "This is the topmost. If you can do this, it is the best
samadhi. Didn't you see? For four hours, I didn't know anything. So you should
do this also. If you cannot walk and chant like this, at least write in a
book, and send it to me." So in this way the temple known as Harinam Mandir
was built, and thousands of people wrote, "Hare Rama Hare Rama." And they made
a temple out of that.

MORAL: Sivananda was an impersonalist, and he knows. But out of his greed, he
can't get up to that devotional platform, though he knows this is the highest,
he can't do anything about it.


Prabhupada very clearly states in his purports to Srimad-Bhagavatam that
receiving knowledge is not like receiving some electrical discharge, some
touch on the forehead and then you get zapped. This was claimed by one
disciple of one famous bogus spiritualist, both from Bengal. So Vivekananda,
he claimed that from his teacher, Ramakrsna, he got all of his knowledge
simply because Ramakrsna touched him on the forehead and there was an
electrical discharge and then Ramakrsna fell down on the ground and said , "I
have given you everything. Now I have nothing." So Srila Prabhupada said that
bonafide transmission of knowledge, diksha, happens by way of transmission of
the holy name of the Lord.


The Gurkhas were used in the last war, the Gulf War, like a secret force. The
British general came to the Gurkhas and said, "We want you to go behind enemy
lines. We're going to drop you from 200 metres from an airplane into enemy
territory. How many of you volunteer?" Generally the Gurkhas are fearless, so
they all raise their hands. This time only fifty percent raised their hands.
The British general was shocked. "You're afraid of Saddam Hussein and his
men?" He went away and was completely bewildered. "I never saw a Gurkha say no
to a fight." So the next morning he came back and said, "You have to explain
yourselves. Why have only fifty percent of you agreed to be dropped for 200
metres behind enemy lines?" So one Gurkha raised his hand and said, "I do not
think I can survive a fall from 200 metres in the air." "No no," the British
general said, "We're going to drop you with a parachute!" Then all the Gurkhas
raised their hands. The British general then really had faith in them. At
least fifty percent were willing to jump out of a plane into enemy territory
without a parachute. These are warriors.


One time a man's car broke down, so he pushed it to a garage and said, "Can
you fix this car?" "I can fix it," the mechanic said, "But it's going to cost
you a thousand dollars." "Well if I have to do it I have to do it," the man
said. "I'll give you a thousand bucks if you can fix my car." So then the
mechanic took a hammer and he tapped the engine, and suddenly the engine was
working very nicely again. Then the man with the car said, "That was pretty
simple! That wasn't worth a thousand bucks!" The mechanic replied, "Yes it is,
because if you didn't know how to do it you wouldn't be driving away in your
car right now." And the man had to pay the process.

MORAL: Prabhupada's godbrothers asked him, "How are you going to make
brahmanas in the western countries? They're mlecchas, yavanas, rakshasas." And
Prabhupada said, "You have to know the process, that's all. It's very simple.
Hare Krsna Hare Krsna Krsna Krsna Hare Hare/Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare
Hare."


One time Jesus made one of his disciples fast. This person was very sick, and
Jesus said to him "You fast for 48 days." The disciples were thinking, "How
can he do this? We thought he was compassionate, but he's making this sick man
fast." After 48 days the man was very thin and weak. Jesus took a cup of warm
milk with honey and a little butter on top. And he said, "Open your mouth." So
the man was relieved. "Finally I'm going to eat something." And then when the
cup was on his lip, Jesus said, "Don't drink. This is your test."
So he was a sincere disciple. You can just imagine after 48 days, he was very
much craving after the sweet aroma of the milk. The man was practically dead
from starvation. But Jesus said, "Keep your mouth open, but don't drink."
Those who had faith knew that whatever Jesus said would be all good for them,
so they were waiting to see the conclusion of the lesson. Others gave up faith
and went away, never to return.
So for several minutes the man kept his mouth open and Jesus help the silver
goblet right below his lip for a long time. This man had been sick for years,
and whatever he ate had no effect. So after about half an hour, a tapeworm
came out of his mouth. This worm who lived in his stomach used to eat whatever
he would eat. Now that the man had not eaten anything for 48 days, the
tapeworm was also starving. So to everyone's astonishment this worm came out,
attracted by the smell of milk. Jesus took two stones and killed it. Then he
said, "Now you can drink. Because you have followed my instructions this
nectar will give you material and spiritual health.


In the plague in Calcutta in 1939, a lot of people were suffering. So the city
council, the municipality, declared that as many rats as you brought in you
would get 5 paisa a rat. Plague is caused by rats, so the council were
proposing this. One very poor man thought, "Here's my chance to get some money
to eat." He found one dead rat in the gutter, and he took it to the
municipality who gave him five paise. He invested that five paise in a piece
of fruit. He sold the fruit for fifteen paise, so he made a profit of fifteen
paise. With this fifteen paise he brought a mechanical piece which he sold for
one rupee at the market. With that one rupee he brought another type of
mechanical piece and he made five rupees. With this five rupees he invested in
some cloth and made fifty rupees. Like this, he went on and on, and eventually
he became one of the biggest cloth merchants in India in the 1940's and 50's.
He has big wholesale stores all over India. He became a millionaire, and the
company symbol over the door was a dead rat.

MORAL: The same principle applies to spiritual life. Brahmins don't have a
monopoly on spiritual life. Everyone who is human, has not only the right but
the responsibility to become spiritually advanced. Athato brahma jijnasa. So
everyone can elevate oneself to the platform of a brahmana.


In Benares in India there was a yogi. His business was that anyone who would
go there, he immediately produced two or four rasagullas and offered him. And
many hundreds and thousands of educated men became his disciples simply
because he could produce rasagullas, which are only four annas worth.

MORAL: People want to see this jugglery.


Ramakrishna had no appetite for women, and he very tactfully said, "Oh, you
are not my wife. You are my mother." And he became Bhagavan. However, he was
not transcendentally situated. In his youth, he used so many women that he
became impotent. So he could no longer enjoy, and he made a statement, "I see
all women as my mother, even my wife." This jugglery made him famous.
Phuraphai govindaya namah. The puffed rice flies away on the wind, so
therefore, "I offer this to God."


A man in California was driving to his wedding when suddenly his hat blew off
onto the highway. Tucked into the brim of the hat was a one-hundred dollar
bill. So, in the middle of traffic the man tried to brake his car and jump out
to receive his hat. But cruising behind him was a highway patrol car, and the
officer inside blared to him over the loudspeaker to stay in his car and keep
moving. The man obeyed, but at the next exit he turned off to a roadside
motel. There he dashed out of his car, climbed a fence, tore across the
highway braving four lanes of traffic and plucked up his hat. Mission
accomplished, he dodged the next oncoming car, only to be hit by another one
and killed.

MORAL: In human life we're meant to move straight on the road back to Godhead,
but maya, illusion, is so strong that she diverts us. She grabs us by our
senses and puls. Maya's "hat trick" is fairly simple. Gets you thinking about
something until you're stuck on it, then reel you in. Once the eyes or the
tongue or any of the senses gets fixated on something, that sense starts
lugging at the mind, absorbing it in whatever maya's offering at the moment.
Then she can carry away our intelligence, and once our intelligence is towed
away, that's it - we're lost. Dhyayato visayan pumsah.


The purpose of a book must be known to the author, and he knows it better than
others. There is an instructive story to show this. It is not only a story, it
is a fact. In Calcutta, a great dramatist, Mr Rath, who was also a very
well-known government official, wrote a book called Shah Jahan. Shah Jahan
means the emperor Shah Jahan. The title on the book is the name of the book's
hero. So one of the friends of Mr Rath inquired, "In your book Shah Jahan, the
actual hero is Aurangzeb. Why have you given this book the title 'Shah
Jahan'?" He could not understand it.
The author replied, "My dear friend, the actual hero is Shah Jahan, not
Aurangzeb." Yet the Shah Jahan book is full of activities of Aurangzeb. But
the fact is that Shah Jahan was the emperor. He had four or five sons, and
when his wife died at an early age, he built her a memorial. Those who have
gone to India and have seen the Taj Mahal building, that was constructed by
Shah Jahan in the memory of his wife, Mumtaz. He spent all his money
constructing that building. It is one of the seven wonders of the world. Shah
Jahan was a very affectionate father also. He did not chastise his sons much.
He spent all of his money constructing for the memory of his wife. But when
the sons grew up, the son Aurangzeb came out very crooked, and he made a plan
how to usurp the empire. He killed his brothers and arrested his father, Shah
Jahan. So this is the plot of the book Shah Jahan. But the author says that
Aurangzeb is not the hero.
Then he explained. "Why? Because Shah Jahan was living, sitting in Agra fort
as a prisoner, and all the reactions of Aurangzeb's activities - the killing
of his other sons, the usurping of his empire - all these things were beating
on the heart of Shah Jahan. Therefore he was suffering, and he is the hero.

MORAL: This is an example that the author of a book knows very well what is
the purpose of that book. Similarly, these Vedanta-sutras are compiled by
Srila Vyasadeva, Krsna's incarnation or Krsna Himself. So He knows what is the
Vedanta-sutra. Therefore, if you want to understand the Vedanta-sutra, then
you must understand Krsna. And Vyasadeva explains the Vedanta-sutra in the
Srimad Bhagavatam. Many rascals will comment in different ways, but the author
of Vedanta personally wrote a commentary, Srimad Bhagavatam.


When Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati Goswami was in Burma opening a Krsna conscious
centre, he used to cook very nice puris in ghee, but all the tenants would
come out covering their noses with their cloths. They complained, "What are
you cooking? What an obnoxious smell!" Yet these same inhabitants had a
favourite preparation called nakil. At every door they would keep a big
covered pot, and whatever animals died in that vicinity - cats, dogs, rats,
whatever - they would put them in the big pot. After two or three years, the
bodies would decompose, leaving a liquid substance. This liquid substance
would then be strained and kept in a bottle, and a little bit of it would be
used on foodstuffs during festive occasions. Whenever anyone opened one of
these pots, the whole neighbourhood would be filled with the most obnoxious
smell for days. And yet they preferred this to the smell of pure ghee.

MORAL: Nature is dictating, "You eat this, you eat that," and people are
influenced by certain modes. They are not allowed to take ghee. Then in the
next life they become hogs.


If Krsna is God, then why is Mother Yasoda binding Him? But they do not know
that this is pleasure. There is a story in this regard. There was a big prime
minister in England, Gladstone, Queen Victoria's prime minister. Someone came
to see him, and the prime minister informed him that the prime minister is
busy so you wait. The man was waiting, and an hour passed and still there was
no message. Finally he opened the door because he wanted to see what the prime
minister was doing. He saw then that the prime minister had become a horse and
his grandchild was driving him. That is enjoyment. He is the prime minister,
but he has become the horse of his grandson.

MORAL: That is the position with Krsna. He becomes the servant of His devotee.


The Monks and the Rabbi (from the "Different Drum")

Prior to the 18th century, the church had a great influence over Europe,
especially the catholic monasteries where the monks performed austerities. But
the monasteries dwindled as time went on, and gradually they became historic
sites. One such monastery was inhabited by an order of monks who had
previously consisted of many branches, but now only one monastery remained,
with only five monks living there, and all of them were over seventy years
old. The abbot was worried that the order would be lost, so he was trying to
make recruits, but all his efforts were going in vain. The monastery was
situated on the edge of a forest, and people used to come there to picnic. In
the forest was a hut which was visited by a rabbi. They all knew the rabbi,
and also they knew the times when he visited the hut. So one time when the
rabbi came, the abbot thought to go and visit him. "Maybe he can give me some
advice about how to save the order." So the abbot went there and when he
arrived he and the rabbi embraced. They were glad to see each other, and they
began to discuss deep spiritual topics. So he was just about to leave when he
remembered the purpose of his visit. "Can you give me any advice about how to
save the order?"
So the rabbi said, "Well to tell the truth, I also have the same problem. No
one is interested in coming to the synagogue. I can't really help you." So the
abbot was just about to leave when the rabbi said to him, "I do know one
thing, however. One of you is the new messiah." This cryptic answer confused
the abbot and he returned to the monastery. He related his meeting with the
rabbi to all the other monks, and told them of the cryptic answer he had
received.
From then on, all of the monks began to think, "I wonder which one of us is
the new messiah? Maybe it's Brother Frederick, he's so strong willed. Or maybe
it's Brother Peter, he's very shy and humble, always willing to lend a hand."
And then they began to think. "It couldn't be me, could it? I mean, God would
have to be pretty hard up to pick me as the new messiah."
So, thinking like this, the monks all began to act very nicely towards one
another, as they didn't want to commit any offence if one of their Godbrothers
might be the new messiah. And they also began to act in a very dignified way
themselves, just in case they themselves were the new messiah.
And the people who came and picnicked by the monastery at the edge of the
forest also began to come and pray in the monastery. They noticed a change of
mood in the monastery, that the monks were acting very reverentially towards
their Godbrothers, and that they seemed to have a very nice relationship. The
people also noticed that the monks themselves also appeared very dignified,
and seemed to be emanating an aura. The people noticed this distinct change,
and sometimes they would talk with the monks. One man decided that he wanted
to experience what the monks were experiencing, so he joined up. His friend
came along to see what he was up to, and he also joined. In this way the
monastery built up again.

MORAL: If we can act nicely toward each other and behave nicely ourselves,
then people will become attracted.